Sometimes I go running.
The more I go running the more I learn about myself.
There is something that I have learned over my many years of running. That no matter how far, fast, and long I run today, when I go running tomorrow it will still hurt. It is inescapable.
I use to try to change that. I use to be under the impression that maybe one day the pain would leave me alone while out on my run. But he never changes. Like the sun rising in the East, he consistently visits every time I am out for another run.
But there is something that changes on my runs. It's not the run itself that changes, it's not the landscape, or the number of steps that it takes me to complete another mile. But I notice that the more I run today, the longer the pain takes to come tomorrow. It still inevitably comes. Like a river flowing downhill, you can't stop it. But I see the change that begins to come in me as I run longer, harder, stronger, and faster. The change that takes place is MY ability to run through the pain that comes. That's all, and that's it....
I no longer try to escape the pain that comes. Instead now I try to embrace him as a friend that I have know for a long, long time. Because I have known him for a long, long time. He comes more consistently than most people in my life. And when I feel him coming, I say hello again, embrace him, and then let him know that today is another day he is not going to win. I let him know, that today i'm going to try to outrun him again, just like yesterday. And he had better bust himself to try to keep up. Because i'm not slowing down. And i'm not going to quit. I'm better than that, and just like yesterday he won't win, because I won't give up. I'll never give in, and i'll never quit.
The feeling that I get as I overcome this small obstacle feels to good. The promise of returning home exhausted, beat up, and worn out after a long run, is too good. The vision of doing the thing that I set out to do is to great. I am better than him, and today, just like yesterday, i'll prove that. It won't be easy, and i'll want to quit just like I do every day. But I won't.
I ran yesterday, to be stronger today. I run today to be stronger tomorrow. I'll run tomorrow to prove that today was not a waste.
The more I go running the more I learn about myself.
That's why sometimes I go running.
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